This is yet another fine example of how our nation doesn’t make sense - before entering uni, we had an option of either going through this scheme (which I had assumed was interest-free always because after all, it WAS your parents’ hard-earned cash that they were forced by the govt to deposit into this pension account) or borrowing money from a bank. The latter option had seemed ridiculous because the words ‘borrowing’ and ‘bank’ sound sullied and taboo when put in the same sentence. The terms for borrowing was that it’d be interest free for the 3 (or 4) years you’re in school for and you will only accumulate interest at the bank’s interest rate starting some months after your graduation.

Thankfully for me, I took some classes in logic and math during my (PAINFULLY PRICEY) university years so I can come to this conclusion, marked in bold to emphasize impact (another thing I learnt in report writing class)

IT IS MORE EXPENSIVE TO BORROW MONEY FROM MY PARENTS THAN FROM THE BANK.

 To be perfectly fair, education here is cheap. My degree cost roughly US$11k which is about how much a year’s education would cost in the west. But it’s unremarkable if you also consider the fact that starting pay for fresh grads here averages at about US$1.7k before taxes and deductions. Which means that a good proportion of fresh grads are taking home US$1.2k a month to spend on necessities in a country that’s the 14th priciest country in Asia to live in. And don’t believe in the bullshit employment surveys where local universities claim their students average a US$2.8k starting pay - the ONLY people I know who have starting pay like that are lawyers.

But hey, pricey or not, this is beside the point which is the issue of how-the-hell-am-I-going-to-pay-off-$16,964.10-in-debts-before-interest-kicks-in-again?

So I have a plan to save myself from the clutches of the evil CPF board (the statutory board that I owe my school fees to; the cold unfeeling pension system that will dole out OUR money to us Singaporeans ONLY when we’re old like what your parents do when you’re 10). Sort of.

It isn’t that bad, I assure myself. All I’d need is to find an extra $600 a month and I can pay off everything by October. Oh wait, November, since January is almost gone. $600 isn’t THAT much right? Right?

Precisely.

I’d just need 30,000 people to click on an ad on the side every month. Or sell half a kidney every 2 months or so - I heard they’d grow back and you’d be good as new. Or work full time every night at McDonald’s.

It’d work out.